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What facts to tell her


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Hello everyone,


I've just joined on this forum. Short introduction: I've loved the touch of fur all my life. Had my first encounter with it when I was like 3 years old and wanted to find it anywhere I was since then. As I grew older it slowly became more like a fetish. I'm 23 now.


My girlfriend knows about how I love soft materials and also her hair. We bought a faux fur jacket earlier and she's totally fine if I use it for other purposes.


I brought up the topic of real fur this morning, because I wanted to know how she feels about that. Her reaction was better than I expected. I've had a reaction before from someone else where I could hardly bring it up ever again. But she only seemed a little unsure about it because of the many animals that have been killed in the process, but I think she likes the look of the clothing. I told her that 'normal' clothing is actually really bad if not worse for nature as well, but I forgot all the facts! I only read about it once before.


My question is, what facts can I bring up to make her feel more comfortable talking about real fur? To be honest, it is for me as well because I love animals and don't want to feel bad ever wearing them or something.


P.s.: I never had real fur in my possession.



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Also, you must reinforce all the positive feelings. If you visit a furrier and she try on a coat, then compliment her greatly and often. Compliment her beauty and outfit choice along with the fur. But also if you are serious about her, make sure she is 100% in love with fur before you marry or else it can cause great problems.

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I am perhaps missing something here, but what is the problem with just saying how you feel and what you feel about what you like. If you are afraid of losing someone because they will have a negative reaction to what you are saying, than is this really someone you would want to get more and more serious about when there is something so important to your life that you do not have some shared commonality or interest in? Best to get the discussions about religion, politics, furs, and money out in the open asap so that neither person is wasting time down the road. I realize my comments are direct, but this is what I believe. Trying to decide how, when, where, etc to bring up things regarding a central part of ourselves seems rather contrived to me, and not the basis of a strong and healthy relationship. Loneliness is a powerful motivator perhaps, but should not override rational sense and judgement. I sincerely apologise in advance if this seems too harsh, but as I said, I am direct. I also do not mean you as in the author of this thread, but in the generic sense.

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Sorry for the late response!


@lynxette, That's actually not what I am afraid for, sorry if I gave that idea. I just like to know more about the facts about fur and share it with her, so that she won't only think of fur as "wearing a dead animal". We have a very open relationship and accept each others 'things' whatever they may be.


Thank you @punisherthunder for those links, I will definitely have a look at them!

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  • 2 weeks later...

If you are talking about fur to a person who isn't necessarily opposed to fur on a moral basis but who might be hesitant because animals have to be taken in order to make it, you could suggest that there are some fur bearing animals that are taken for other purposes beside fur. It would be a shame to take an animal, use only part of it then then throw the pelt away. Wouldn't it?


Rabbits are used for food. Rabbit fur is nice to play with and, because it's plentiful, it isn't too expensive, compared to many other kinds of fur.


Coyotes are sometimes harvested when they kill farmers' livestock and things like that. If they must be killed, why not use the fur?


Same thing goes for beaver and muskrat and similar species. Beaver dam up waterways that need to be used for water travel and/or irrigation. I've always liked beaver fur when it's nicely made. Sheared or plucked beaver is soft and super dense.

Muskrats often undermine stream banks or earthen dams and levees. These animals have to be trapped out in order to prevent floods or stream erosion. We might as well make use of them. Right?


I've known a few people who felt squeamish about fur but weren't necessarily opposed to it. When I asked them whether they thought fur would be okay if it came from the kinds of animals that are already being killed for food or other reasons, they all agreed that it would be okay.

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