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A Few Jokes


JGalanos
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You know you are getting old when you tell your best friend you are having an affair and they ask "Is it catered?"

 

 

My friend's three year old came crying to her. "I stubbed my toe", the boy wailed. "Which one?" his mother asked. "The one that had roast beef," he sobbed.

 

 

A friend and her husband were participating in a blood drive, and as part of the prescreening process, an elderly volunteer was asking some questions. "Have you ever paid for sex?" the woman asked my friend's husband sweetly. Glancing wearily over at his wife, trying to calm a new baby and tend to several other children milling around her, he sighed, "Every time."

 

 

Reviewing a new handbook for a Catholic HMO, I was amused to find this list of conditions that would merit a visit to the emergency room: heart attack, severe bleeding, car accident and ... loss of conscience.

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